Losing friends to serious relationships.

Over the years I have lost several friends to serious relationships. While I don't think that dropping your friends because you've met someone is cool by any means - and I can honestly say that I don't do this myself - I do think that people in general simply forget about their friends when they meet someone, without even thinking about it. They do it because it's what people do. It's not something that one should take personally, even though it's hard not to at the time. When we're single our friends fill a need that we have for closeness, company or just a means to escape loneliness and emptyness. When we meet someone that is filled by someone else, and suddenly we don't have time for our friends anymore. We justify it by saying that it's normal, everyone does it. And that is for the most part true. Not that it makes it alright. I think people are generally selfish creatures. We take what we need from other people in order to survive, and when we don't need them anymore we cast them aside. You can't really argue with it or get angry about it, because we're basically just animals and we do what we need to do to stay alive. )This, by the way, is the number one reason for why I prefer dogs to people - dogs aren't fickle). Sadly, I think that no matter how close friends are, we're still disposable once we cease to serve our purpose. In the end, even the deepest friendships fade when a romantic relationship comes along (In most cases). This if of course not to say that there are exceptions to this rule, however rare they might be. But I don't think we can be angry about it, since this is simply human nature, to bad or good, just the way we people are. We use other people because they serve a purpose. Not because we're malicious or like to mess with others, and it's we're not even aware that we do it, it's just in our nature. Then of course, once the relationship ends the distant friend might turn up on your doorstep again, wanting to resume the frienship. Or maybe the friend has an hour to spare because their girlfriend/boyfriend is buy, so they call Ms. Reliable. Since I've never been one to reject people I always accept, but it never feels the same again. Something has been lost. A trust perhaps. It may start to feel like old times again but it never really goes back to being the same. That nagging doubt will always be there. I will never feel quite secure again. Speaking for myself, I've long grown tired of this and have decided that I would rather not have friends at all you have friends. Because as neat as it is to have friends that you think consider you family, it really sucks when they no longer have any need for you, and by relying mostly on yourself instead of the company of others, you save yourself a whole lot of doubt and confusion when that inevtiable time comes when they meet someone and you're left quietly asking yourself "What did I do wrong?", "What did I say?" or "Was I not supportive enough of their new relationship?" It simply takes too much energy and, quite frankly, it hurts my feelings. Spending time with friends who make sudden appearances after a long period of silence is like getting drunk or riding the tilt-a-whirl - it feels great at first and then you feel like crap afterwards. Either that or it just feels plain weird and awkward. It's my own fault, since I have a tendency to make myself too available. I tend to cling to people. However, this all needs to stop now, for my own peace of mind. So, I can proudly say that these days I have learnt how to let go of people. Yes, it's lonely and it's certainly not what I would prefer, however it is a necessary skills that I've been forced to develop. Finally, as someone said in a comment to another blog on a similar subject, a friendship IS a seriously relationship, and if one hasn't figured that out then maybe's that's the problem